As a father of three young kids, I see every day how sleep (or the lack of it) can make or break a child’s day. Getting enough sleep isn’t just about avoiding cranky mornings. It has a huge impact on how children feel, act, and handle stress.
I remember one morning when my 4-year-old woke up after a restless night. He wrapped himself in a blanket, sat on the kitchen floor, and burst into tears because his toast was cut into squares instead of triangles. Nothing I said could convince him that the shape of his toast was not, in fact, a big deal. Meanwhile, my 10-year-old (who had slept well) was ready for school and calmly reading. That moment reminded me how much sleep affects a child’s wellbeing.
Why Sleep Matters
Sleep is when a child’s brain processes emotions, restores balance, and strengthens their ability to handle frustration and stress.
When children get enough sleep, their brains:
- Process feelings better – Sleep helps children regulate their feelings and respond to situations more calmly.
- Remember things better – The brain reinforces lessons and experiences, helping children retain information.
- Stay balanced – Sleep resets the brain’s ability to handle frustration and challenges.
- Keep control of emotions and behavior – Well-rested children are less likely to be irritable, anxious, or impulsive (Meldrum, et al., 2018).
Signs Your Child Might Need More Sleep
Problems with sleep do not always look like sleepiness. Some children may act hyper, irritable, or emotional when they are overtired.
Emotions:
- Frequent mood changes
- More stress or worry
- Trouble making or keeping friends
- Fighting more with family or classmates
Thinking and Focus:
- Hard time paying attention
- Trouble solving problems or making choices
- Forgetting things easily
Behavior:
- Rubbing eyes or yawning a lot
- Difficulty waking up in the morning
- Falling asleep in the car or at odd times
If your child has trouble with emotions, behavior, friendships, or family relationships, sleep could be part of the issue.
How Much Sleep Do Children Need?
Experts recommend the following:
- Infants (4-12 months): 12-16 hours (including naps)
- Toddlers (1-2 years): 11-14 hours (including naps)
- Preschoolers (3-5 years): 10-13 hours (including naps)
- School-age children (6-12 years): 9-12 hours
- Teenagers (13-18 years): 8-10 hours
Even missing one or two hours of sleep per night can affect a child’s mood, focus, and social skills (Hirshkowitz et al., 2015).
Over time, lack of sleep can contribute to long-term mental health issues, such as anxiety and depression (Gregory & Sadeh, 2016), as well as other health problems, such as changes in appetite and weight.
Tips for Helping Children Get Better Sleep
1. Keep a Regular Bedtime Routine
- Do the same calming steps each night, like bath, brushing teeth, and reading.
- Avoid loud music or video games before bed.
2. Stick to a Set Sleep Schedule
- Go to bed and wake up at the same time every day.
- Try not to stay up late, even on weekends.
3. Limit Screens Before Bed
- Turn off TVs, tablets, and phones at least one hour before bedtime.
- Screen light makes it harder to fall asleep.
4. Create a Sleep-Friendly Bedroom
- Keep the room dark, quiet, and cool.
- Use a nightlight or curtains if needed.
- Make sure the bed is comfortable and only used for sleep.
5. Encourage Physical Activity During the Day
- Active play during the day helps children sleep better.
- Time outside in the sun helps set the body’s sleep rhythm.
6. Avoid Sugar and Caffeine at Night
- Do not give children soda, chocolate, or energy drinks in the evening.
- A light, healthy snack is okay.
7. Help with Bedtime Worries
- Talk about fears in a calm way.
- Give children a comfort item like a stuffed animal.
- Try deep breathing or bedtime stories to relax.
Dad Thoughts
Sleep is one of the best ways to support your child’s emotional and mental well-being. Children who sleep well are happier, more focused, and better able to handle stress.
As a parent, I know bedtime can be hard. Some nights, it feels like a battle. But making sleep a priority is worth it. It will help them grow into resilient, emotionally stable, and well-adjusted individuals.
If your child is having a hard time with feelings, behavior, or focus, take a look at their sleep. It might just be the missing piece of the puzzle.
More Reading
References
- Gregory, A. M., & Sadeh, A. (2016). Annual research review: Sleep problems in childhood psychiatric disorders—A review of the latest science. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 57(3), 296-317.
- Hirshkowitz, M., Whiton, K., Albert, S. M., et al. (2015). National Sleep Foundation’s sleep time duration recommendations. Sleep Health, 1(1), 40-43.
- Meldrum, R. C., Jackson, D. B., & Mann, K. (2018). Child sleep and behavior problems. Journal of Youth and Adolescence, 47(5), 1145-1157.
- Touchette, É., Petit, D., Séguin, J. R., et al. (2007). Associations between sleep duration patterns and behavioral/cognitive functioning at school entry. Sleep, 30(9), 1213-1219.
