As a father of three—a 10-year-old daughter, an 8-year-old daughter, and a 4-year-old son—I take my role as a protector and teacher seriously. There is nothing more important to me than making sure my children grow up feeling safe, respected, and confident.
I firmly believe that abuse prevention education is one of the best gifts we can give our children. After my children went through the program at ChildBuilders, I noticed a real difference in their confidence and awareness. I asked them questions, like “Are secrets safe to keep?” and “What would you do if someone touched you in a way you did not like?” Their answers showed me they understood how to protect themselves and when to ask for help—important skills that every child should learn.
I want every parent to know: teaching abuse prevention works. We cannot be with our children every moment, but we can prepare them to stay safe, speak up, and know they are not alone.
Why Abuse Prevention Education is Crucial
Abuse can be hard to see or understand, especially for children. Many do not know they can say “no”, or that some behaviors are wrong. Others stay silent because they feel confused, ashamed, or scared.
Prevention education teaches children the knowledge and skills they need to stay safe from abuse. It teaches them to recognize unsafe situations, take assertive action, seek help from safe, trusted adults, and to know that they are never to blame if someone harms them.
Key Benefits of Abuse Prevention Education:
- Prevents harm:
- Children who understand what is safe and unsafe are better able to protect themselves.
- Encourages open communication:
- Children learn they can talk to safe, trusted adults when something feels wrong or confusing.
- Teaches healthy boundaries:
- Children who learn to respect boundaries carry that respect into adulthood.
- Builds confidence and self-worth:
- Knowing their rights helps children feel strong, safe, and ready to speak up.
This approach to prevention education does not scare children—it empowers them. Over time, it helps them build respectful relationships based on trust and care.
What Kids Learn in ChildBuilders’ Abuse Prevention Education
1. Know What is Safe and Unsafe
- Children learn the difference between kind and hurtful words, and the power of words to help or to harm.
- They learn that secrets about touching are never safe.
- They are taught the correct names for private parts and how to follow body safety rules.
- They learn that when someone leaves marks, bruises, or pain, this could be abuse—and they should tell someone they trust.
2. Use Assertive Words and Actions
- Children learn the difference between passive, aggressive, and assertive behavior, and that assertive choices are respectful choices.
- Younger children learn to say, “Stop, I do not like that,” using strong voices and body language.
- Older children learn to speak clearly about their boundaries and respect the boundaries of others.
- Children learn it is okay to walk away from a situation that feels unsafe.
3. Talk to a Safe, Trusted Adult
- Children name safe adults they trust, like parents, teachers, school counselors, or police officers.
- They practice how to ask for help when something feels wrong or confusing.
- They learn that trusted adults will listen and help them.
4. Keep Telling Until Someone Helps
- Children are taught to keep asking for help if the first adult does not listen or believe them.
- They learn that telling is not tattling—it is how they stay safe.
5. It’s Never Your Fault if Someone Harms You
- Children hear this message over and over again: If someone hurts you, that is a choice they make—and it is never your fault.
- They are reminded that adults are responsible for keeping them safe, and they should always feel safe asking for help.
What You Can Do At Home
Parents and caregivers are children’s first teachers. You can help your child learn how to stay safe by building safety habits into everyday life. Here are three ways to get started:
1. Talk Openly About Body Safety.
- Together, read the book “Your Body Belongs to You” by Cornelia Spelman. Discuss the different parts of the body, using the correct names for the private parts.
- Talk about ways your child can keep their body safe. Remind them that private parts stay covered, and no-one is allowed to look at or touch the private parts of your body unless both
- 1) they need help, AND
- 2) it is not a secret.
- Review ChildBuilders’ rules about private parts.
2. Teach and Practice Setting Boundaries.
- Help your child understand the difference between welcome and unwelcome touch. Start by naming behaviors that feel okay or not okay. For example, “I like hugs, but I do not like being tickled.” Then ask your child to share what feels good or uncomfortable to them.
- Explain how you feel when your own boundaries are crossed. This helps your child recognize their own feelings. Often, feelings of discomfort, fear, sadness, or numbness indicate boundaries are being crossed.
- Practice saying, “Stop. I don’t like that,” using a strong voice and body language. Role-play different situations where your child can practice standing up for themselves—and also practice how to listen and stop if someone else says no.
- Explore ChildBuilders’ Assertiveness resource for more ideas.
3. Identify Trusted Adults
- Together with your child, read the book, “A Terrible Thing Happened” by Margaret Holmes. This book talks about how important it is to get help with a problem instead of keeping it to yourself. Talk about what happened in the story and why it was so important for Sherman to have someone to talk to.
- Ask your child, “Who are the safe grown-ups you trust?” Encourage them to name at least two adults outside the home, such as a teacher, coach, or school counselor. Explain that safe adults are people who help you, listen to you, and don’t make you feel scared or confused.
- Practice asking for help by role-playing a situation where you or your child needs help with a problem and tells a safe grown-up you trust.
4. Partner with Your School
- Ask your child’s school about bringing abuse prevention education—like ChildBuilders’ Stand Strong • Stay Safe program—into the classroom. Research shows that students in schools with abuse prevention programs are more likely to speak up and get help when they need it (Finkelhor et al., 2014). Contact ChildBuilders to learn more about how to bring this program to your community.
Dad Thoughts
Abuse prevention education is not only about protecting children. It is about helping them grow up strong, confident, and aware—able to stand up for what is safe.
When kids know their rights and trust the adults around them, they are safer. I have seen the difference in my own children. They know how to speak up and ask for help—and that gives me peace of mind. Every child deserves to feel respected, nurtured, and protected. I believe in this work, and I hope you will too.
Resources
References
- Finkelhor, D., Shattuck, A., Turner, H., & Hamby, S. (2014). The lifetime prevalence of child sexual abuse and sexual assault assessed in late adolescence. Journal of Adolescent Health, 55(3), 329–333.
- Holmes, M. (2000). A Terrible Thing Happened. Magination Press.
- Spelman, C. (1997). Your Body Belongs to You. Albert Whitman & Company.
